When we last left our intrepid hero (moi) he shared the good news of his impending fatherhood to the woman he loved more than anyone including his now preggers wife. This post is going to lay bare the depths of my heinous, embarrassing behavior, somethings that to the best of my knowledge is known only by myself and my equally guilty counterpart.
I'm not proud of what I did, quite the opposite, I'm ashamed, and apologize to my ex even though she doesn't know the extent of my failure as a husband. She deserved better than me, and maybe things wouldn't have ended like they did if I'd be more honorable.
Those who read this blog, if in fact there are any may be tempted to stop following me and to that I say I'd be sorry to see you go, even though I don't really know if anyone is out there besides me. I know I have one friend in RL that reads this and in part I had to clear my conscience, and I really didn't want to tell you these things. But you have to know them in order to fully understand me (something I'm striving for). Please stick with me. I'm hoping to use my Modus Operandi to better understand why I do the things I do. Kind of a mental self examination of patterns of behavior.
Why dear reader would he marry someone he didn't fully love? Good question. My wife and I were two of a kind, we were each other's second choice. It didn't mean we didn't love each other, we did very much. it's just that our true loves had been and were unobtainable, so we settled for each other and hoped for the best.
Now my wife knew that I was going to tell our good news to my heart's desire and despite some minor misgivings, agreed.
My friend was overjoyed on hearing the news. and since we had recently moved to an area not to far from where she lived, she became an occasional visitor/helper to my wife. Her husband traveled a lot on business and so she was left with time on her hands. Time she used to help us get ready for the twins.
Now during this time, shortly after we moved into the new condo, I was showing my friend the new digs. My wife was off with her mother somewhere and wouldn't be home for hours. Well feelings and nature took their course and in short time we were in my bed and screwing like rabbits. did I feel guilty? Hell yes, but not so much to stop banging each other. We were both hungry for some good sex and so we did.
We continued our affair up to and past the birth of the babies. She was in the waiting room with our families when I came out with the boys. she took photos etc.... My wife had had a C-section, and thus was rather groggy from anesthesia, and I was going to drive my paramour home and come back to the hospital, but "The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry" and all that stuff. So I had to go home and change out of scrubs that I wore for the birth into more comfortable clothes, needless to say Once again we wound up in my bed screwing for all it was worth. All I could think about the whole night was how my twin sons should have been ours, not mine and my wife's. Add to the fact that it was her husband's birthday and she chose to be with me during the birth of my kids, rather than with her husband (who she suspected of cheating on her) spoke volumes to the then 20 something me.
Our affair continued through out the marriage and only really ended when my wife and I divorced two years later when her first choice became available to her. But that is a story for another blog.
In the parlance of the day (TL;DR: I cheated on my pregnant wife even on the night my boys were born.)
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