I've been in database development for a long time over 25 years and Business Intelligence/Data warehousing for the last 16 years give or take. The last four and a half years I've gone back to consulting/contracting. The pay is pretty good, but for the most part there are no benefits. Which sucks as I'm getting older and am starting to need them.
Back in August I was contacted by a recruiter for a FT direct position that I'd never considered for a company that I'd never heard of that I should have come across in my travels. I worked like hell on the various interviews and hoops that were put up during the application process. I aced them all. I lost the position to another candidate that had more direct experience in the role than I did. No problem. But they were considering me for a second position that was to open up at the end of the year and I received a verbal offer and start date. Then while waiting for the official offer letter they closed the position in year end budget cuts... I was devastated to say the least. It was th efirst time I was excited about a job in a long time. I'd turned down another offer at a much better rate to try for this job.
So the job hunt continues. I've got resumes out a number of organizations both local and distant. Some might require travel and some might require relocation from Southern California, a place I've made my home for over 35 years now. Now, I've been trying to get out of California for a while now, but for some reason I keep finding reasons to stay. After my first divorce I moved to Austin Tx which I loved, but I was missing my boys growing up and the amount of time I was able to see them was too small, so I moved back to So, Cal. About 7 or 8 years later they moved to Arizona, but by then I was on my third marriage and she didn't want to move.
We finally divorced and I got together with my current GF and her kids, so once again leaving So. Cal. was off the table. B is sometimes willing and sometimes not willing to relocate. Now with my being on the hunt again and looking for work, it's possible I'd relocate, but I'd have to do it without B. Considering the issues we're currently having in the relationship, this might not be a bad thing. But here's the latest complication:
My relationship with W. currently we're in what's best described as a FWB relationship. I've known her for over 35 years now and we keep missing a chance with each other for various reasons detailed here in other entries. Neither of us are free right now, and we both realize the need to clean house and get things straight in our own lives before we could begin to try any sort of exclusive dating/relationship. She knows how I've been crushing on her (to use a current term) for as long as I've known her. We're also very simpatico in many of the things we like.Neither of us would have to do things alone.
But she's not sure she'd want to move away from her son. I can't say I blame her. I hated moving from mine. However I recently learned just how much my moving to Austin 25 years ago hurt her. and I want to avoid that happening again. Even though there's actual ongoing nor promise of an exclusive relationship on either of our parts, there's the potential of one (assuming a lot of things fall in to place for both of us) occurring. I don't want to risk not connecting with her again. So I've been keeping her in the loop on my job search and my thoughts about relocating. I've also made sure that W knows that while I'm not basing my final job/relocation decision on our potential future, I fully intend to take her desires into consideration. By this I mean if I'm offered an interview or position some place away from So. Cal. I would see if it's some place she'd consider moving to (this is of course working under the assumption that B & I split). If so I'd have her come on the trip to the location with me so she could get a feel for the place and see what she thinks about it.
I had a conversation with the family last night about my job hunt and the possibility of relocation. two of the three kids said they wouldn't relocate, R said he thinks I'm going to since I've made no bones about wanting to get out of So. Cal for a long time. B said she might or might not, but since N is pregnant, I tend to doubt that she's really willing to relocate if I do. If I do relocate, I guess my relationship is over. That might be the easiest way to go.
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